Catch Me If You Can

Was Prokofiev really responsible for a composition entitled "Five Pieces for a Runaway Piano?"

Ring Toss

Two weeks ago Mom decided to go through her jewelry. "I want a jeweler to clean and check my rings."

"I can take them to a jeweler for you," I offered.
"No, not you," said she. "I'll ask Margo. She'll know a jeweler that I can trust."
Margo is our daughter.

"I can't find that good cameo ring," she added, matter-of-factly.

The next day (Thursday) I found her sitting on her bed combing worriedly through a pile of necklaces. "I can't find my wedding and engagement rings," she said. "I know I put them back in that little box, but they're not there." She hasn't worn her rings for years. It's hard for her to push them past her enlarged knuckle, and once they're on, they feel too loose. I looked around near the dresser where the "little box" is kept and found the "good cameo" under her bedside table.

Thursday evening, Friday, and Saturday we searched for the missing rings. The engagement ring was a large emerald set off by diamonds; the wedding band had a row of diamonds. We went through drawers, we moved furniture, we lifted cushions, we took the bed apart, we went through pockets. Have you any idea how many wadded-up Kleenexes old ladies carry around in their pockets? I pulled apart stacks of wadded-up Kleenex and even dissected clumps of kitty litter. We delayed putting a weeks' worth of trash out so that I could go through that.

The Sunday after the rings first went missing Mom told our daughter that she had lost them on Saturday. She added that she had wrapped them in white paper and secured them with a rubber band before returning them to their box.

She hasn't accused me of stealing them. Yet.

She is sure that they will turn up because "they have to be in here somewhere." I hope she is right.

Kitchen Lizard

He said, "Have you seen the kitchen lizard?"

What he REALLY said was, "Have you seen the kitchen scissors?"

Amish Snow Tires

We've had plenty of "wintery mix" recently in suburban Washington, DC. Nearly two weeks ago, all three routes to our house were blocked by police cruisers with flashing lights because of accidents on the overpasses. I was trying to drive our grandson home from school, but kept having to turn around. I thought we'd never get there, until I found a route that went under, rather than over, the railroad.

We have a cabin in Knox County, Ohio. Increasing numbers of Amish are moving into Knox County. In fact, our cabin was built by Amish labor about three years ago. According to a local history buff, who is also our neighbor and good friend, Holmes County, which is adjacent to Knox, has a larger Amish population than Lancaster County, PA. So I asked him how the Amish cope with icy conditions when traveling by horse and buggy.

Our friend responded that tungsten carbide particles embedded in the horseshoe provide traction on icy roads. However, tungsten carbide is an abrasive, which wears ruts in the middle of the lane, ruts that do not fit the "track" (inter-tire width) of the cars driven by the "English." These ruts cause cars to swerve when the roads are wet. People complain that the Amish " don't pay gasoline taxes, but they're ruining our roads." In defense of the old-order Amish, our friend pointed out that they DO pay real-estate taxes. Although a large percentage of their income goes for real estate taxes, the Amish operate their own schools.